Depression survivor

Mental illness. Such a dirty word but so many people have it. The list of mental conditions include depression, panic disorders, OCD, eating disorders, bi-polar disorders… the list goes on. An average person would imagine a mentally ill person in a straight jacket, screaming to the top of their lungs, spewing vulgar language – not a quiet, introvert who would rather stay in bed than to deal with the outside world.

I, for one, am that quiet introvert. If I had my choice, I would never leave my home (those are the really bad days). But staying secluded is not an option. It’s damn near impossible because I have so much to do. I call myself a ‘survivor’ of depression because well… I am still surviving. I have my good days where I can get out of bed and go through my day. Then I have those bad days where it’s hard to put a smile on my face or keep the tears from falling. However, even though there are days when I just feel like there is not light at the end of the tunnel, taking my life is not a choice.

As of late, there have been so many stories of suicides. Not only by younger and older adults… but from children. I’m talking as young as 9 years old. At one point, I couldn’t fathom what would go through a mind that young to want to take their own little life? Then I realized – Wait… yes I can. I was once a 9 year old. I still can remember some of the feelings I had at that age. The only difference is back then, I didn’t have anyone to talk to or no one that would believe me. Today, there are so many outlets for children to have conversations, but they truly don’t believe they have anyone to listen to them. It saddens me to hear of these instances and the heartbreak the parents of these children must go through.

My hope for my blog is to have at least one person to realize that they are important and they do matter. Sure, there may be some tough days, but those tough days won’t last forever. If you feel like you need to talk, please reach out to someone you trust; or reach to a complete stranger if you have to. Sometimes the most unexpected person could be your intentional blessing.

Until next time … be blessed!