Have you ever?

Have you ever felt alone in a room filled with people? Have you ever felt unworthy when you are abundantly showered with blessings? Have you every felt like you are in a deep, dark hole even though the warmth of the sun is shining on your face? Have you ever wondered how blessed you are to be your age when you should have died a long time ago – but God spared you?

No? Well, these are the thoughts that encompass my brain constantly. Sometimes, it could be a thought-provoking question that keeps my mind working, which is not a bad thing. Other times, I could be over-thinking, which is unhealthy mentally. (Six of one, half a dozen of the other).

As of late, over-thinking has gained it’s momentum. I constantly worry about my children, dealing with my low self-esteem, after 3 hours into my day and then it seems like it’s time for bed – I am mentally exhausted. And on top of all of that, I have a ‘newborn’ at age 50 – an adorable Pug named Rico. Now I am physically exhausted on top of everything else. But looking at his face always brings a smile to mine.

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Since it is 4:35 am, I might as well try to close my eyes for a couple of hours. Maybe my thinking will put me to sleep. We’ll see.

Until next time … be blessed.