I woke up around 6 am – surprisingly. I had slept pretty much most of Tuesday away and slept through the night. As of late, it hasn’t been a regular thing for me to wake up early. I remember waking up with my husband during the beginning and middle of the covid pandemic, and eating breakfast together. But something happened to my sleep cycle that caused this thing called insomnia to rear its ugly head. When it came, it stayed.
“Surely today, I will finally get a room” were my thoughts. I needed a shower. I was tired of covering my hot breath inside of this mask. 🤢 I was already sitting up in my bed when breakfast arrived. And you guessed it – it came with milk and orange juice. <sigh> But despite that, the meal was good.
I stayed up for a while to allow my food to digest. Thankfully, my ‘closet space’ had a TV. And fortunately, they didn’t monitor the shows I watched either. It stayed on the Oxygen True Crime Channel. 😉 I purposely pinned the speaker next to my head so I could not hear what was going on outside my door. Yes, I still had a sitter, but she paid more attention to the guy next door to me. I was the quiet one.
Sometime thereafter, I drifted back to sleep only to be awakened by the Doctor making her rounds. We talked for a bit, her asking how I was doing? What brought me there? How did it get to this point? The obvious questions. But when I asked when I will be put in a room, everything she said became distorted when I was told I would not get a room today.
WHAT? “Ma’am … do you realize that I have been here since Monday afternoon at 3:30 pm. It is now 9:30 am on Wednesday and I have not showered or brushed my teeth since just before I came here? Do you have any idea how how nasty I smell and how filthy I feel?” I already had self-esteem issues, now I had to worry (myself) about how embarrassing it would be for someone to go in the bathroom after me, knowing I had an odor? How unclean I felt as a woman with woman parts? I was outraged. I was pissed. I was so disappointed and mad that I cried.
The Doctor sincerely apologized. They didn’t have separate bathrooms/showers set up for patients waiting for rooms. Nor did they have the staff to help. What she offered nearly made me lose my composure … heated bath (baby) wipes and a toothbrush with toothpaste. 😳
So here it is … I had to go in this nasty public bathroom to brush my teeth. After washing my hands, I used several paper towels to push the sink button to make the water run (I never touched that button with my bare hands). After scrubbing my teeth for what seemed like hours, I took more paper towels to push the button for water, used my other hand to cup water so I could rinse my mouth out. All I could do was ask God to “please cover me” as I wasn’t sure if the water was sanitary enough to put in my mouth. As I was heading back to my room, I told my sitter that I was going to close my door to use the bath (baby) wipes. I am assuming by the look on my face, she had no other choice but to say “Okay”. Once I shut the door, I made sure I had 2 more clean gowns and socks to put on. Also, I requested another mask. Without getting too graphic, I can tell you that I have NEVER, EVER been so humiliated in all of my 52 years. To make matters worse, my ‘closet space’ had been warm the last few days (to where the nurse recommended ice packs to cool off) so there was, no air circulating whatsoever. I finally wiped every area I could reach, put on my fresh garments and was done. I tightly packed all of my filthy wipes back into the package and prayed for the courage to open my door. Once I opened it, there was no turning back. I was so grateful that there was a trash can right beside my door and my sitter was behind the nurses’ station. I was the only one who had to endure my own stench until I couldn’t smell it no more. One thing I debated the entire time – should I throw my Adore underwear away? I was torn because I had just bought them and the lace was so pretty. Well, I wasn’t going to waste anymore brain cells. I folded them up in a few paper towels and just tucked them in my bed. I will decide later. No way was I going to ask the nurse to put them in my locker. No way!
I spent the rest of the day aggravated with the entire hospital system, with the entire process. The only time anyone ever saw me was to use the phone to call my husband or to use the bathroom. I only called the nurse for pain meds (back/bursitis) and a little anxiety. The last time I called my husband for the night, I saw my nurse go in my room. He inflated a small air mattress to go on top of the bed to add some comfort for my back. It really didn’t help much but I was appreciative.
There was more to the day, but it was not as interesting as what happened earlier. I’m sure my stench story was more than enough without talking about all of the ‘bare backsides’ I saw. 🙄 Stay tuned tomorrow for Day 3.
Until next time… be blessed.
6 thoughts on “My humiliating 72 hour stay – Day 2”
Funny how being in hospital is supposed to be therapeutic…
Yes … I had those same thoughts.
It’s almost as though they were actively working at traumatizing you further. This is very disheartening. I’m so sorry you had to go through this.
I can honestly say, I was traumatized by the entire experience. I was in desperate need for help. Instead, my mind was filled with uncertainty and lack of care along with what was already going on with me. 😣
I’m waiting patiently for the next chapter. But I really hope they pulled through in the end and actually helped you. 🤦🏾♀️
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